A few ideas about how a modern Yes, Prime Minister might sound…

No-Deal

“But Sir Humphrey, I can’t see why no deal can remain as a negotiating strategy, it would be a disaster!"
“Well, of course it would! You know that, I know that. It takes very little insight to know that.”
“Does the Prime Minister know that?”
“Bernard, if we list the things the Prime Minister doesn’t know, we’ll be here all week.”
“But why have we allowed him to carry on down this path? The amount of resources Operation Yellowhammer is consuming…"
“That is precisely why we have allowed it to continue, and precisely why it must continue! After years of public handwringing over austerity, ideological cuts, staff reductions, privatisations - all fundamental damage to our standing - we have finally found a way of getting a Conservative government to increase the size of the Civil Service!”

The AV referendum

“Sir Humphrey?”
“Yes, Bernard?”
“I think the PM has made up his mind.”
“Wonders will never cease. What, pray, has he made it up about?”
“He’s supporting the move to Alternative Vote.”
“He is WHAT?!”
“Supporting the move to AV, he’s going to make a speech about it tomorrow…”
“Then he must be stopped! This entire charade has to end, we can’t have voting reform sweeping the country.”
“Why not?”
“Reform, Bernard. New systems… Change!”
“But would that be such a bad thing?”
“Sit down, Bernard. The current system is working exactly as it is supposed to, and as such there is no need to… change it. That would destabilise the country for no discernible improvement.”
“But is first past the post working properly? It distorts the vote share, and…”
“Bernard, have you been reading the Morning Star again? First past the post has nothing to do with representing the opinions of the British people. It simply causes an occasional shift in power between two moderate and reasonably centrist major parties, ensuring neither is able to do anything too outlandish, lest they be ousted from government, or be prevented from entering it at the next election.”
“But democratically…”
“Democracy is simply the random element in a long-established system of sensible majority government. It gives the voters something to do.”
“Surely they have things to do - jobs…?”
“Underestimate the average voter’s desire to cause political chaos at your peril, Bernard - they’re basically anarchists…”